IC inbox

[nogoldfish]

This is an IC inbox. It exists now. Go wild.

Comments

[hardballsy]

[Josh's butt is multi-talented; not only does it dial phones! It puts them on speaker, too.

The conversation comes to an abrupt halt, Josh mid-word as he hears bad language coming from his pants. Quickly, the sound of fumbling follows, then:]

Hello?

[nogoldfish]

Hello.

[ Sickly sweet. ]

You rang. Unintentionally, I presume.

[hardballsy]

...yes.

[Hang on, hang on. Give him a second.]





Mycroft?

[nogoldfish]

[ ... He should have just ignored it, shouldn't he? ]

Yes. And you keep your bloody mouth shut about it.

[hardballsy]

[Well, yeah.]

You havin' a bad day, buddy?

[nogoldfish]

My day is fine. The only annoyance is this ailment.

[hardballsy]

Which is...?

[It doesn't even occur to him that Mycroft's ailment is his potty mouth. Josh is thinking he's been this way the whole time and has just been hiding it.]

[nogoldfish]

I do not particularly make a habit of swearing.

[hardballsy]

Really?

[Feigned shock.]

You seem like the type to enjoy it.

[nogoldfish]

How?

[ DISGUSTED ]

[hardballsy]

In my experience, it's always the quiet, dignified ones who have the most dark secrets.

[nogoldfish]

Is a penchant for cursing a dark secret?

[hardballsy]

For you? Sounds like it.

[nogoldfish]

[ SIIIIGH ]

Well, seeing as there's no fucking point continuing this discussion ...

[hardballsy]

[That's the point.

That, right there, is the point, and Josh cracks up.]

[nogoldfish]

[ TAKES A DEEP BREATH ]

Good day, mister Lyman.

[hardballsy]

Good day, mister Fuck—

[Oops?]

Excuse me. Mister Holmes.

[nogoldfish]

Mister Lyman.

[ Do not test him, he will fuck you up. ]

[hardballsy]

Please. You can call me Josh if I can call you Mister Fuck.

[TESTING 1, 2, 3.]

[nogoldfish]

Why the-- hell would I agree to that?

[ Not going to say fuck, not going to say fuck. ]

[hardballsy]

Because your other dark secret is that you've got a bone-deep desire to have a little fun once in a while.

But I won't tell. Promise.

[nogoldfish]

My idea of fun does not include ... that.

[hardballsy]

Then what does it include?

[nogoldfish]

[ A pause. ]

Why do you want to know?

[ Are you ... interested???? ]

[hardballsy]

[Well now he sure is.]

I've heard tell that it's one of those things people talk about sometimes.